This week the focus is on making restitution to all persons you have harmed. So far, I think this might possibly be the most challenging step of the 12 step program. This means that you contact individuals you have hurt with your addictions or behaviors and let them know how sorry you are about what you did to them, and ask for their forgiveness.
In this past Sunday nights Addiction Recovery meeting, an LCSW from out of State visited the meeting my husband and I were missionaries for. During the sharing portion of the meeting, he described this step in a way that everyone could understand. He said that taking this step is like falling on the gravel and rocks on the round and scraping up your knees really bad. He said that we have two choices... ONE is that we can sit there on the ground, with the rocks in our bleeding and pretty banged up knee feeling sorry for ourselves and let the wound fester until it is infected and much worse and causing us more pain, OR... we could pull out the rocks in our knees, clean up the wound and then watch the healing proceed. In other words, we can either hang on to all of the hurts we have caused for the rest of our lives and let them fester causing ourselves and others long term grief and pain , OR we can repent and clean up (get rid of the rocks and gravel) the mess we have made. We do this through the Atonement of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and all those pieces of gravel that had caused ourselves and others pain, can be made clean, and right again.
I loved this analogy because everyone in the room knew what he was talking about and understood what they needed to do. I share this with you to encourage you to get rid of the hurts that weigh you down and keep you festering. Take the opportunity to make restitution to the Lord, and to those you have harmed in the past. You may not always get the desired outcome, but at least you will have taken the steps to let the healing begin. Your new addiction free life can be the example to those you have made restitution to, that you have really changed and you are no longer the person who desires to hurt others.
The Atonement has made this possible. I coin the phrase from a friend of mine who said to me one day... "The Lord made our shoulders round so that things could roll off of them." If our shoulders were squared, things would just stack up until they weighed ourselves down. They aren't and I urge you to lighten the burdens that you carry buy taking this step today. It will take some time, but once you have made amends to everyone, your burdens will be lighter, and your soul will feel cleansed.
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